Friday, December 21, 2012

Santa's List

I'm currently staring straight ahead at two full weeks of freedom.  It's the best Christmas gift a Tigress could possibly get.  Thinking about my Christmas good fortune got me thinking about what's on the wish lists of our favorite Tiger players.  Luckily, I'm in with the big man and he gave me a sneak peek.

Verdiggity- That elusive "perfect game" that he's fantasized about in commercials.   I'm thinking Santa has already been pretty generous with two no hitters, but my philosophy at Christmas is to dream big.

Dougie Fresh- New dancing shoes and for the doorways of Detroit to be raised by six inches to accommodate people of all heights.

Ricky P- A new wing man since G$ has moved down to Hotlanta.  Preferably someone with as much game as G$ and the same ability to bring in the ladies.

SchEYEzer- He already has the perfect pair of goggles for when celebrations come around, now he just needs sunglasses that match.

Sanchez- A new home in Detroit since he's here for five years.  I'm going to guess he goes with a suburb like Bloomington Hills, but maybe he's a city boy at heart.  There are many buildings in Detroit just waiting for renovation, Anibal.

Dirty Dirks- A haircut.  Oh no, that's my wish list.  He actually wants a turtleneck with an "extra wide" neck for those chilly Detroit evenings.

Avila- Double knee replacement surgery.  He is also requesting catching equipment with more cushion.  He can't handle another run into the Prince.

Donnie Kelly, Ryan Suckburn, and Delmon Young- A return back to their favorite team, the Tigers.  Sorry boys, not going to happen.

Cabby- A trophy room.  At the pace he is going, he's going to need more room in his house for all his bling.  Also, good news!  Cabby is on the "nice" list this year.  Big improvement from last year!

Tigerberry- 100 brand new batting gloves.  He's going to pull a Willie Mays Hayes next year and tack them up on his wall for every steal.

AJacks- The love and affection of every Tiger fan that was previously given to Granderson.  Come on people. Curtis has been gone for years.  It's time to start giving that love to AJacks, he deserves it.

Smokes- NicoDerm CQ and Nicorette

Mike Illitch- A World Series championship.  Maybe this year Illy.

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