Most practical winter sport: Biathlon. Imagine, you live in Minnesota in the 1800s and it's winter. How do you provide for your family? Why you strap on your cross country skis, grab your gun, and go get dinner. While the athletes aren't shooting at squirrels or rabbits, the practicality of the sport still shines through. Tell me you won an Olympic medal and I'm impressed. Tell me you medaled in the biathlon and I'll invite you to dinner.
Most chill athletes: Snowboarders, especially the slopestyle and half pipe. Have an epic fall in snowboarding? Get to the bottom, smile, and flash a peace sign. Fall in almost any sport and pound your head in pure heartache and agony. The snowboarders are just happy to be invited to the Olympics after being off the grid for so long. Let's be honest, they are ratings gold and it would be wise to add more high-flying events to boost interest in the general public.
Most unchill athletes: Ice skaters. While I enjoy a good free dance, there are no more nerves present than during warm ups before each group in ice skating, especially for the women. Tears of joy and disappointment are often present in the ice rink. There's a reason they are called ice princesses. Even after the competition, there's room to complain and file complaints. You know what's hurting your sport? Your poor attitude. Chew on that for a while.
Sport that brings in the standard sport fan: Hockey. Want to see all your favorite NHL stars? They're here, you just have to look for them. It's actually a good exercise in last name origin and genealogy. Big winners this year is that country to the north. Everyone needs to be good in something I suppose.
Sport you literally only watch every four years: Curling. I probably watched seven curling matches, not all US teams. The terms themselves are whimsical. Throw the rocks at the house, but have a strategy for the hammer! Anyone can be a curler. The Canadian men take it to a whole new level with their workout routines, but any office worker could grab a broom and jump out there.
Most talked about sport: Bob Costas's conjunctivitis. Nothing brings out people's interest like a little pink eye. Here's my question though, with both Al Michaels and Dan Patrick in Sochi, how are those two not tapped to pinch hit for Costas? They have the experience in sports whereas Meredith and Matt are news desk jockeys. I guess either one of them is better than the British lady with bad posture who was on the afternoon circuit. Sit up lady! This is the Olympics!
Worst act by a loser: The camera people who hounded Bode Miller after his bronze medal interview. Look back people. Sure the reporter tried to make him cry, but those cameramen kept the zoom close on his face and even told someone to get out of the camera shot. He's 36 and has been through a lot. Let the man have a little space. It's the polite thing to do.
Most random pairing in an event: Nordic Combined. In what universe does ski jumping go with cross country skiing? How about moguls with ice dancing next time around? Sounds super.
Best fashion: Norway's curling pants. That's right, they beat out all of Johnny Weir's outfits and head pieces. Maybe in four more years Johnny can try again. This time around he'll have to settle for the silver.
Now that all the pomp and circumstance has passed, it's time for good, old American baseball.
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